


Fast Cars and Freedom

by BlamScilesShipper



Category: Supernatural, The Simpsons
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-22
Updated: 2020-09-10
Packaged: 2021-03-02 17:20:43
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 19,394
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24320458
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BlamScilesShipper/pseuds/BlamScilesShipper
Summary: This is an AU that takes place in Denton, Texas. Dean is a mechanic with a band, and Cas is a college student who is also a virgin. This is pretty much fluff, but it's gonna get darker as it goes on, I can feel it now. Also, John and Jody are the kids' natural mother, whenever I post something new, that is going to be the new headcanon. Mary is gone. Some of ya'll hate John, (I won't even go into that it pisses me off so much) I hate Mary.Hope I will keep this updated, I got inspired and Destiel won't be denied.
Relationships: Bobby Singer/Ellen Harvelle, Dean Winchester/Castiel, John Winchester/Jody Mills
Comments: 4
Kudos: 3





	1. Chapter 1

**_Disclaimer: The characters of_ ** _ SPN  _ **_do not belong to me. I shouldn’t have started this. But I got inspired, and Destiel won’t be denied. Cas is a virgin and a sophomore in college, and Dean’s a mechanic who has a band. This takes place in Denton, Texas, which I don’t know much about, but I know it’s small and Jensen’s from Texas. So is Christian Kane, whose character from the show I’m using in this fic. We’re going to pretend there’s a college in Denton. And if there actually is, well awesome! I literally have no idea where this will go._ **

Fast Cars and Freedom

By Julia

It was a hot afternoon, June was just really getting started. Dean Winchester was just finishing up at his father’s mechanic shop, when this cherry 50s Chevy Bel Air pulled up. It was so hot, Dean snapped a pic with his phone. Then, the most gorgeous and adorable guy got out of that Dean had ever seen. Dean’s stomach filled with butterflies. He looked like he came from money, he must go to Denton College. Dean brushed a hand on his coveralls, trying to find his breath. That guy was coming his way and he was going to say something to him. It was hot, so he had tied the top half of his coveralls around his waist and wore a black tank. Dean’s green eyes met this guy’s blue ones, and he gasped. It was too late. He was in love, and he didn’t even know his name. Leo Webb, his friend that he banged on occasion, was going to be disappointed. Dean was going for this guy. Dean had never felt this attracted to anyone before. He offered his hand. “I’m Dean, what can I do for you?” 

When Castiel Novak’s gaze on that gorgeous boy in front of him, his heart was beating so fast, he felt like a hummingbird. He shook Dean’s proffered hand, and almost forgot his name. “I’m Cas. My car just needs an oil change.” He took in the other, he wasn’t muscular, but he wasn’t a slight man, either. Cas could tell there were tight abs under that tank top. “I know it’s close to closing, but I live right around the corner.” He caught himself not to lick his lips in anticipation of a kiss, that was. They finally let go, and Cas couldn’t stop himself from nervously. “Can you fit it in today? If not, it’s okay. I can walk home.” He handed his keys over, his fingers brushing Dean’s. 

His hand took the keys, and Dean could feel this charge between them. They both stepped closer subconsciously. Dean’s mouth was just slightly open. He couldn’t help but stare at Cas like a stalker or something. To his credit, Cas was looking at him just as hard. They drew even closer, and Dean could feel Cas’ breath on his face. Then, before Dean knew it, they were kissing. And not slowly, either. Hungrily. Dean’s tongue slipped easily into Cas’ mouth, and Cas’ arms slid around Dean’s waist, right in the middle of the parking lot. Dean’s arms went around Cas’ neck, and one hand went up into Cas’ hair. Cas tugged Dean closer, and Dean could feel Cas’ length against his. They broke for air, and immediately locked lips again. Dean didn't care who was watching. It was Texas, they should stop. 

Breaking the kiss, Cas had to breathe. “Um, hey.” He said, his face bright red. He’d never kissed anyone before. “Um, I don’t… I’ve never been kissed before.” He and Dean hadn’t let go, they were both still in each other’s arms. Dean’s fingers were still softly moving through Cas’ hair. Cas melting at the feel of it. He’d never had a boyfriend, either. “By the way, that feels really good.” He told Dean, his eyes fluttering shut. He let out a small moan. “ _ Really _ good.” He said. His eyes opened, and they met Dean’s green ones. He felt like he could see into Dean’s soul. Despite the fact that he would regret it, but he said, “Should we let go?” He hoped his tone belayed how much he didn’t want to. Cas’ hands were on the small of Dean’s back, and he stroked it through Dean’s tank top.

His fingers moved down to the hair at the nape of Cas’ neck. Dean could tell Cas liked it, his length was getting half hard against Dean’s. “We don’t have to, but I  _ am _ getting off work, and we can go grab some dinner.” Dean licked his lips and then kissed Cas again, his lips biting at Cas’ bottom one lightly. “This has never happened to me before. I’m…. you’re okay with this, right? We  _ just _ met.” Dean knew that Cas was going to say he was, it was just a feeling in his gut. He was full of butterflies, and he barely knew his own name. “We can still do this again, though, if you want.” Dean licked his lips. He really didn’t want to let go. “I’ll pull your car in. We can’t get to it till tomorrow.” Dean told him, still reluctant to let go. But he did, and Cas looked disappointed that Dean’s fingers weren’t in his hair anymore. 

Dean told Cas to wait right there, and Cas gave him a nod. What the fuck was going on?! He didn’t even  _ know _ this guy. But he just couldn’t help it. Cas felt like he’d been hit by a love spell or something. Cas felt eyes on him, and turned. It was a guy that looked about Dean’s age. “Um, hi?” He asked, a bit curiously. He was about Dean’s height and weight, and had gorgeous shoulder length brown hair. Cas waved a little. “I’m Cas.” He said, as the man came ever closer. The other offered his hand, telling Cas that he was Leo, Dean’s  _ friend _ . Cas wasn’t sure, but wondered if he meant boyfriend. 

The man in question rejoined them, freshly showered. He stepped up to Cas, taking his hand, lacing their fingers tightly together. Cas’ stomach started doing summersaults again as soon as they were together and touching bare skin. Dean could tell, just by looking at him. It was really cute. “See you later, Leo.” Dean said this a bit pointedly. Leo left to go work on a car, and Dean looked at Cas. “Don’t mind him, okay?” He said, as he got them started towards his Impala. He was very proud of it. His ex-Marine father had given it to him. Dean missed giving his brother Sam rides. Sam had passed away. His younger sister Callie was working to get her own car. “You…. you’re gorgeous.” Dean finally managed. 

It wasn’t something that Cas didn’t want to let pass, but he did anyway. “Thank you. You’re the most gorgeous man I’ve ever seen. No one’s ever wanted me before.” Cas shivered as Dean’s thumb stroked the back of his hand. When they got to Dean’s car, Cas felt himself being pressed up against the car, and Dean’s mouth was on his. Cas kissed him eagerly back. The kiss was deep, and long. Cas didn’t want to kiss anyone else for the rest of his life. While that ought to scare the  _ fuck _ out of him, it didn’t. The magic when Dean kissed him was too amazing. Cas groaned into the kiss, Dean’s hands were underneath the front of Cas’ shirt, and he was stroking Cas’ abs with his lithe fingers. It felt like Dean was setting him on fire with his touches. 

When the kiss broke, Dean looked into Cas’ blue eyes. “I can’t explain it. But I want you. And it feels like more than sex. I think…. It sounds crazy, but I think I love you.” He hadn’t ever said that to someone before. He had had a few flings, but he’d never been in love. Dean’s cheeks flushed as he realized what he’d just said. There was a flush on Cas’ cheeks too. “You live alone?” Dean asked, and Cas nodded. “Okay. ‘Cause I don’t. I just turned 21, but I’ve been saving up so I can move out.” Dean really hoped that Cas wouldn’t ask him about his family. Dean would have to bring up his dead baby brother, and he didn’t want to. Not right now. He was too happy. “We’ll go to your place, and order in pizza.” He said, and Cas agreed. Dean opened Cas’ door for him, and off they went. 

An hour later, they were on Cas’ couch, eating meat lovers’ pizza on paper plates. Cas had gotten out a few wine coolers his brother Gabriel had gotten for him, since Cas was only 19. Dean was taking a huge bite, and then he reached for a strawberry daiquiri wine cooler. “Cas, your place is so nice. So much better than my house.” Dean didn’t feel at all bad about saying it, but he knew he should. His mom, Jody, was the sheriff. And John, his father, had a very successful mechanic business. And they lived in a nice, middle class home. Cas’ place was in the rich side of town. So Dean felt a bit less than. “I won’t ask how you pay for it. You can tell me when you’re ready.” He promised. Dean finished his piece and got another. “I can stay over, if you want. But we don’t have to do anything you don’t want to do.” Dean for once, was fine if they didn’t have sex. He just wanted to sleep in the same bed with Cas, cuddled up against him. He really wanted to spend as much time as possible with Cas. They were sitting as close as possible on the couch. Cas was reaching for his drink as he looked at Dean. He told Dean he could stay if he wanted. Dean leaned out to kiss him, tasting pizza and pina colada on his lips. “Okay, cool.” Dean said, grinning. “I really want to just cuddle up with you. I can’t wait to make love to you, but I just, I want to be around you all the time.” Dean tore into another slice, Cas was looking for something to watch. 

He looked at Dean. “I would love for you to stay over. And sleep with your arms wrapped around me.” Cas told him, picking up another slice of pizza. He took a bite, his eyes still on Dean. “I can’t explain this. It just feels, so right. I should be scared as fuck, but I’m not.” He shrugged a shoulder. “I can’t explain it. But I don’t care. My whole life, I’ve been so straight laced, and I never take risks. But I want to take this risk with you. I don’t care if it’s scary. I want to be with you.” He paused, chewing some pizza. Once his mouth was free, he reached out and ran his fingers through Dean’s gorgeous brown hair. Dean’s eyes briefly fluttered shut. “I love you, too. I don’t know why. I just know that I do.” The pizza was finished, so Cas closed the pizza boxes. “I think I’ve got ice cream.” He said, a grin playing on his features. He stood, Dean pouting slightly at the loss of Cas’ body next to his. He knew Dean loved pie, and he actually had some. He wanted it to be a surprise. It was Oreo pie, he’d made it himself. And ice cream, he knew that Dean had a sweet tooth. Cas loved that about him. Cas loved to bake. He could bake all kinds of treats for Dean. He ran his hand across his scruffy cheek, and felt butterflies in his stomach. He could hardly believe this was happening. He put some pie and ice cream on plates and went back out to Dean. He was sitting more relaxed on the couch, and again immediately grinned when he saw dessert. “Cas, babe, I  _ do _ love you.” He took the plate Cas gave him, and Cas cuddled up to him. 

Another hour later, and Cas was on top of Dean, and they were making out. Cas didn’t really know what he was doing, but it seemed to be doing it for Dean, so it was okay with Cas. Dean sucked on Cas’ tongue, as his hands slipped up under Cas’ tee shirt and was running fingers up and down his back. It was making Cas shiver. Cas had reached between them, and ran his hand over Dean’s cock, and Dean arched up under his touch. Cas let out a gasp as Dean’s hands moved down into his bottoms and gripped his ass, squeezing tightly. Cas let out a moan against Dean’s lips, and Dean let a thumb circle across Cas’ entrance. He didn’t slide a finger in though, they hadn’t discussed positions. 

Taking a breath, Cas shifts a little in Dean’s arms. “Can…. I don’t want to stop. I know I won’t regret this. But, I’d like to bottom.” Cas said. He really wanted Dean to be inside him. Dean looked up at him with a sly grin, and flipped them. Cas’ rear was in the air, and his face was pushed into the sofa cushions. Dean got Cas’ pants off, and placed himself at Cas’ hole. His tongue began to circle it, and Cas moaned into the pillow. Dean licked Cas’ asshole, his hand moving to cup and stroke Cas’ balls. Dean knew this was his first time, and he didn’t want to hurt him. Licking a couple of fingers, he let one into Cas, working it and crooking it inside him. Cas moaned, a guttural moan. Cas was getting harder in Dean’s other hand. 

At Cas’ urging, Dean let another finger slide inside Cas. He loved making Cas this hot. “You ready for my cock?” He asked, and he got a groan in reply. Dean would take that as a yes. He had a condom, but thankfully, Cas had some lube. After Dean slid the condom on his long hard cock, he lubed up and carefully slid into Cas. Cas gasped out loud as he did so. Dean started off slow, but Cas managed to tell him to go faster. So he did, and his hand reached to rub Cas’ cock in time with his hips. “Oh, baby, you’re so tight.” He said, wondering if Cas was the type to peg himself. If he wasn’t, that would explain why he was so tight, other than he was a virgin. He pushed harder, brushing up against Cas’ prostate. They both groaned, and Cas groaned again as Dean’s fingers moved and brushed the tip of Cas’ cock. Cas was going to come soon, he was already leaking precum. Dean rocked his hips harder against Cas’, and his boyfriend came. Good thing Cas had a leather couch. Dean put both hands on Cas’ hips now and set his hips off, as fast as he could go. Dean groaned and managed to come, crying out Cas’ name. He ran his hands up Cas’ back as Cas squeezed around him once more. Then Dean pulled out of him, and moved to pull off the condom. He was pretty good at tying them off. He went to throw it away in the bathroom. When he came back, he was greeted with Cas’ rear in the air, he was wiping off the couch. Dean, grinning, moved to him and grasped it, goosing him. Cas jumped, slapping him lightly on the arm. “Sorry, babe, I couldn’t help it. I’m going to get more wine coolers. You want?” When Cas said he did, Dean grinned and reached down to put his boxer briefs back on. 

As soon as Dean left the room, Cas’ phone went off. It was Charlie, calling him. “Hey, Char.” Cas said, he had pulled his underwear back on, and the jeggings he’d had on. He wasn’t capable of just hanging out naked. He’d tried. Dean came back then, with wine coolers and pie. Cas just smiled at him, he wasn’t surprised Dean got the rest of the pie. “What’s up, Charlie?” Cas asked, as Dean leaned to kiss him. Before he could tell either of them about each other, Charlie told him that Cas’ sort of ex (they’d gone on two dates) had shown back up. Constantine Richmond. Cas froze. He’d gotten  _ really  _ bad vibes from him, and that’s why they’d only gone on a couple of dates. “What did Connie want?” Cas asked. He just couldn’t stop his voice from shaking. He was busy listening to Charlie telling him he wanted to know where Cas was, and why barely registered. Dean reaching out and lacing his fingers tightly with Cas’. He could tell something was wrong. Cas didn’t want to see him again. He thanked Charlie for letting him know, and they hung up. Cas was still jumpy and shaky as he turned to Dean. “My… this guy that I went out with a couple of times is looking for me. We only went out a couple of times because he creeps me out.” Cas’ hands were shaking as he put his phone down. Dean squeezed the fingers of Cas’ that he was still holding. Cas’ eyes filled with tears. “He really really scares me, Dean.” He let Dean pull him into his arms, and they decided to go to bed. Dean practically carried him, Cas’ knees were so weak. He’d thought it was over. 

The following morning, Dean woke first. Cas had slept clinging to him all night. Dean looked at him, still sleeping, and wondered what he was dreaming about. He brushed fingers through Cas’ hair and then leaned to kiss his cheek. He’d have to go into work soon, but he was going to make breakfast. He got up, also knowing he’d have to go home and get some fresh clothes. Showering here was still a possibility. This caused him to grin. He didn’t bother with grabbing anything to put on, he had on his underwear, and went out to the kitchen. Cas’ place was a one story. He went out to the fridge, to assess what there was to cook breakfast in. He got out some eggs and bread, sadly, Cas didn’t have any bacon. Dean could live on just bacon alone. He began to hum a Bon Jovi song as he started to crack eggs. 

Padding into the kitchen, Cas found Dean cooking. “I woke up and you weren’t there.” Cas pouted, and wrapped his arms around Dean from behind. Pressing kisses to Dean’s collarbone, Cas said, “I’m so glad you were here with me last night.” He was actually worried about what Constantine was going to do. He rested his head on Dean’s shoulder, holding onto him as tightly as he could. His hands stroked Dean’s abs, his fingers playing in the hair that led down into his boxer briefs. He took in the scent of Dean, and he felt a bit better. “I love you so much.” Cas said, it took him aback how much that was true, since they’d only just met, but it was true. Cas thought they’d known each other in a past life. He’d never felt this strongly about anyone so quickly. He kissed Dean’s cheek and let go to start coffee. 

“Love you too, babe.” Dean told him, adding the whisked eggs to the pan. “I gotta go to work soon, but if you come with me, I can work on your car first and you can come home.” Dean didn’t have to work more than four hours, it was his short day. He stirred the eggs with a spatula, and Cas started the coffee. “It’s going to be okay. I won’t let anything happen to you.” Dean told Cas, kissing him soundly on the mouth. Then he moved to put some bread in to toast. Cas got out the coffee cups, and then went to get the paper. There was a startled cry, and Dean hurried to see if Cas was alright. On the porch was a heart laying on a piece of newspaper. Dean put his arms around Cas, who was shaking. “It’s animal, babe.” 

Cas barely heard him as Dean told him he’d gone hunting with his dad and his uncle Bobby, and so he knew for sure it was an animal heart. He let go of Cas to dispose of it, and moving on auto pilot, Cas went to get the food before it burned. By the time he’d put the food on the plates, Dean was back and moved to wash his hands. They ate breakfast quietly, Cas didn’t seem to find his voice to speak. After breakfast, despite the fact that Dean told him he’d stay if Cas wanted, Cas told him to go to work, and text him later. A long, passionate kiss by the door, and then Cas was alone. He put away the dishes in the dishwasher, and he just wasn’t sure what to do. He didn’t have any classes that day. 

That afternoon, Dean got home to chaos in the kitchen. It was two, and his sister Callie was baking cookies with their friend Garth, who was actually Dean’s age. Callie was the baby, Sam had been in the middle of them. Dean was surprised Callie’s friend Meg wasn’t here, too. Come to think of it, where was Jo Harvelle? She was sort of their cousin, her mother was married to Bobby Singer, John’s best friend. They’d served in the Marines together. She’d used to date Sam before he’d passed away, but she hadn’t stopped hanging out with all of them. “Hey, what’s going on in here?” He asked, putting his car keys in the drawer by the garage door and went to get a beer. Dean’s eye caught Garth’s, who blushed. Dean sighed and gave him a small smile. Garth had a crush on Dean. “Guys, guess what? I’ve got a boyfriend.” This caused gasps from both of them, but Dean knew that Garth wasn’t gasping from happiness for him. He told the story of how it had gone down, minus the finding the animal heart on the porch. “Leo is going to be so pissed.” Dean said, his sister agreeing with him. “I didn’t plan this, though, it just kind of happened.” It was true. But Dean knew Leo was going to be angry. Leo had feelings for Dean. He was a couple of years older than Dean, for him, that had been a draw. But Dean hadn’t fallen in love with him like Leo had. “We weren’t exclusive though. So he can get mad, but he can’t really say anything about it.” Dean hated that he was hurting Leo, though. They’d been friends a long time. 

Watching her brother reach for some finished cookies, Callie tossed her blonde hair over her shoulder. She supposed she should have pulled it back. She rolled up more dough to put on the cookie sheets. “We’re doing this for Mom, she won best county sheriff again.” It was a contest in their county every four years. Their mother, Jody, had won it three times as a sheriff. Callie slapped Dean’s hands as he reached for more cookies. “This is for Mama.” She told him, firmly. She felt a tiny tugging on her pants leg. Callie looked down. It was Dean’s two year old, Cory. “Look, Cory, Daddy’s home.” She told her nephew, handing him a chocolate chip cookie. He’d only lived with them a month.

“Hey, kid!” Dean said, leaning down to pick up his son. He was still getting used to having a son. One of his exes had gotten pregnant and moved without telling him. Dean had full custody now because she’d killed her own parents and gotten the lethal injection. “I’m sorry I was gone last night, kiddo.” Dean said, bouncing the toddler on his hip. The little boy looked more like his mother than he did Dean. Black, silky curls, olive skin tone, not one freckle. He didn’t even have Dean’s green eyes. Still, you could tell he was Dean’s. “You are going to love Daddy’s new boyfriend.” Dean had already decided Cas was the one, and he was sure that Cas had decided the same. He just felt it in his gut. The doorbell rang then, and Dean went to get it. 

It was Cas, holding bags of takeout from the diner in town, Rufus’ Diner. He knew Dean loved their burgers, and Cas couldn’t be alone any longer that day. His eyes widened when he saw Dean holding a baby boy, munching on a cookie. Seeing Cas’ confusion, Dean told him who Cory was as he let his boyfriend inside. Cas leaned to kiss Dean, and brushed his fingers through Cory’s curls. “Hey, Cory. Do you like burgers and fries?” He asked, and the shy toddler gave him a nod. He looked at Dean, who looked nervous. “I think your kid is adorable.” Cas told him, he didn’t care that Dean had a kid. Dean was proving to be just the thing that Cas needed. He hadn’t been looking, but he loved him all the same. Cas would love his son, too.

Leading them to the kitchen, Dean introduced them all to Cas. “You’re the best, Cas, bringing burgers.” He said, putting Cory in his high chair. He got out a burger, cut it in half, and gave Cory a small amount of fries. Cas had passed out some to everyone. Dean wasn’t surprised that he’d gotten so much. There were still more bags when everyone had a plate in front of them. Dean took a huge bite of his burger, groaning. He loved Rufus’ burgers. And Cas knew what he liked on them. They had talked about everything the day before. Except Cory. Dean felt badly about that. He should have told Cas. But honestly, it really was still sinking in that he had a little person who depended on him to live. Dean smiled at Cas as he went for some fries. “I love you, Cas.” 

“You know I love you, Dean.” He told him, surprised Garth and Callie weren’t surprised that those words had been used. Cas supposed that Dean must have told them when he got home. Cas brushed a hand through his messy waves. Cas ate a fry, and caught Cory looking at him. He looked at him back, giving the adorable boy a smile. “Is your burger good?” Cas asked him, and the boy gave him a shy nod. “Are you gonna marry Daddy?” Cory asked, reaching for his sippy cup of milk. Everyone gave a pause. Cas’ gaze went to Dean, silently asking him what he should say. Dean just gave him a sly smile. Cas set his eyes on Cory. “I don’t know, Cory. Maybe.” He was blushing deeply, and he actually hoped that they  _ would _ get married. Cas knew that should freak him the fuck out, but it didn’t. He jumped a little as he felt Dean’s foot started to run up his leg. He couldn’t keep the blush off his face. Cas had never been this flustered over a guy before. But Dean was so amazing. Cas wouldn’t have been able to deal with that heart. Cas reached for his soda to take a long sip. He blushed more as he met Dean’s green eyes. They were so beautiful. They were going to be Cas’ undoing. He also ate the last of his burger, trying not to blush so much. He was pale, it always showed up better than on others. Cas took another sip, licking his lips. 

After he’d gotten another burger, Dean looked at Cas. He licked his own lips. The front door was opening, and he could hear his parents’ voices. Dean grinned as John and Jody came in. “Hey, Mom, Dad. This is Cas.” He said, and they both put out hands for him to shake. Dean got up, and he was pulling a ring off his finger, and kneeling by Cas’ chair. Everyone’s mouth dropped open, and Dean looked at Cas, taking his hand. “Castiel James Novak, I know that we just met. But I love you, and you love me. Why wait? Will you marry me?” He asked, and Cas’ blue eyes misted with tears. But he managed a yes and Dean slid the ring on his finger. “This was my granddad’s. He gave it to Dad. Now I’m giving it to you.” Dean loved the look of the ring on Cas’ finger. 

Looking down at the ring, Cas marvelled for a moment, and then he put his arms around Dean’s neck and kissed him. “I can’t believe this.” Cas said, but his tone was in awe, and his eyes alight with happiness. Everyone swarmed around to give their congratulations. Cas’ eye caught John Winchester’s, and Cas wondered what the other man would say. He gave Cas a large smile, and shook his hand, welcoming him to their big family. Cas gave him a shy nervous smile, but thanked him. Cas couldn’t wait to get Gabriel over here to meet Cas’ new in laws to be. Gabe would love them. Cory was tugging on Cas’ pants leg, and Cas leaned down to pick him up. Cas did so, the boy settling in easily on Cas’ hip. He looked into the boy’s brown as he played with Cas’ hair. He could see himself loving this gorgeous toddler as his own. 

_ Two months later _

Cas was surveying his and Dean’s new place in a less quiet part of Denton. It was three doors down from John and Jody’s. They needed them nearby. Cas had found a lump in his left pec, and it was cancerous. They had married quickly, and now, they were settled into their new to them home. It was from the 6os, but all newly done. Cory was playing in his very own room, and Dean was calling for pizza. Cas was supposed to be taking his meds. As he was getting them out, his in laws arrived, with some pies and cookies. “Oh, hey, Mama, Dad.” He said immediately. His hair was still intact, but it would start to fall out soon. 

Leaning to put the desserts down, John gave his son in law a soft smile. Jody was instantly making sure Cas was taking his meds right. She was the town sheriff, but she’d lost her mother to cancer, so this was sadly old hat to her. Cas tried to tell her he was alright, but she kept fussing. John snorted laughter. “Get used to it, kiddo, she’s definitely a protective mama.” This is when Dean came in, carrying some alcohol. He was finally 21. He told Jody to stop fussing over his husband, but he knew it was a pointless endeavor. He told them all about the pizza, and then asked John where Callie was. “She’s coming with a new friend, Maggie.” 

That intrigued Dean. He’d heard of a Maggie. She was newish to town, being raised by her older brother Bart. He wasn’t sure how he felt about it, though. Maggie and Bart had lost the rest of their family to a fire in Springfield, Illinois, and Bart seemed to be a bit lax with the rules when it came to Maggie. Dean knew his sister was a lesbian, she’d told him. As far as he knew, he was the only one in the family who had any clue. He couldn’t out her. That was her news to tell, not his. “Well, okay.” Dean finally said, leaning down to kiss Cas and hand him some joints from the pot dispensary. It was medically legal here, and it helped Cas with his pain. 

Cas used Dean’s shirt to tug him down so he could kiss him. He did his best to keep it as chaste as he could. Because of John and Jody’s being there. “Did you get all the pizzas ordered?” He asked. Dean told him of course he had, giving him a sly grin. This is when Cory’s tiny little legs come running and threw himself at his grandfather’s legs. Dean smiled as John lifted Cory, much as he remembered John doing the same with him when he was Cory’s age. He leaned and hugged his mother. “Hey, Ma.” He said, he hadn’t ever called hr ‘Mama’ like Sam and Callie had growing up. Even Cas called her that now. Dean kissed his son on the cheek and gave him a smile. “Like your new room, buddy?” He asked, Cory nodding yes excitedly. 

The front door opened again, Callie and her blonde friend Maggie Simpson came in. They were armed with board games. Both of them went to give Cas a hug. Then Callie set the board games on the floor by the small dining room table. Then she got herself and Maggie Jack and Cokes. Her parents had told her it was okay as long as they didn’t go anywhere drunk. Callie planned to sack out with Mags in the guest room. She had been getting feels and hints from Maggie that she was into Callie. It was driving her crazy not knowing. So she wanted to get Maggie drunk so she could learn the truth. It wasn’t a date rape thing. Then she leaned to give Cas a kiss on the cheek. “I’m so glad to see you.” She was surprised that her brother had gotten married to someone he barely knew, but Dean and Cas were so in love, it was crazy. Callie watched as Maggie gave Dean a hug, and then laughed as Cory ran for her. She reached to lift him up. Callie had to admit, watching Maggie with her nephew was really kind of hot. Callie heard the doorbell, and was surprised. She got it, and it was the pizza. Dean came to pay for it, and Callie helped him carry it into the family room. Everyone dug in, and Callie did her best to get to sit with Maggie. She wanted to be with her so much. She was forcing herself not to play with her friend’s hair. 

Everyone discussed the game they’d play first, and charades were agreed upon. Dean set his son up in bed with a tablet, knowing he’d fall asleep in minutes, and then went back down to join everyone. He was hoping to be able to play some songs for Cas tonight. With all that had gone down so quickly, he still hadn’t gotten to play for him. On the plus side, they hadn’t gotten anything more from Cas’ sort of ex. But he also had had a few tense meetings with Leo. Dean had known that his friend would take his marriage badly, but this was honestly overkill. Garth had at least, done his best to show Dean that he was happy for him. Dean hoped Leo would get on board. They were good friends. Or they were supposed to be. That’s when someone asked where Leo, Garth, or Ash was. Dean, who was currently filling his husband’s plate with more pizza, looked up. “Well….” He knew why Leo and Garth weren’t here. As for Ash, he didn’t know. “Well, I know why Leo and Garth aren’t here. But I don’t know I can tell you why. But believe me, they won’t show up.” Dean handed Cas the plate, and they had all decided on teams. Couples against couples. Dean noticed that Maggie didn’t object to being called a ‘couple’ when it came to her and Callie. Dean supposed that boded well for his sister’s want for Maggie. He then got himself some more pizza. That’s when there were footsteps, and Leo was standing there. “Leo?” Dean asked, looking at him with a surprised look. He hadn’t invited Leo, but he knew that his friend had known about it. “What are you doing here?” He asked, curiously. 

“Dean, can we talk?” Leo asked, his eyes meeting Dean’s green ones. Leo knew how shitty this was going to make him look. But he had to speak up. He didn’t think it was going to get him anywhere, but had to try. And he’d been there when Dean and Cas had first met. Dean got up, and they went out onto the porch. Dean, he was sure, didn’t want to wake up Cory. Leo folded his hands, and then ran one through his shoulder length hair. “Okay. I…. I’m in love with you, Dean. You’ve known this guy for two months. You got engaged after two days. How can you be in love with him? We’re best friends, Dean. Have been all of our lives. It was more than just sex between us.” 

They had to salvage this, because of the band. Dean rubbed his sweaty palms on his jeans. He didn’t  _ want _ to appear angry. “Okay. You will always be my best friend, and crush. But Leo, I wasn’t in love with you. I’m sorry. And please, don’t do this. We need to stay friends for the band. You, me, and Callie. We’re Dusty Roads. We’re supposed to take over country music. That’s important to both of us. And I love my husband. More than anything, except my son.” Dean hadn’t meant to lead Leo on, he really hadn’t. “I don’t want to hurt you. I really don’t. I know you had feelings for me, but I was hoping you’d meet someone else. I’m sorry, Leo. Just, don’t let this break up the band. Please.” Dean have him a pleading look. 

Even if it was what Leo had known this would happen, he still was angry. “You barely know him! How can you love him?” He stepped closer, drawing Dean into his arms and kissing him, before Dean could stop him. That’s when Leo found himself flying backwards. Cas looked at him. “Hands off my husband, Webb.” His tone was cool, like ice. Leo looked up at him from the ground, he’d fallen off when Cas had hit him. Leo bit his lip, he knew that he shouldn’t bring it up that Cas was able to hit pretty hard despite the fact that he’d begun chemo. He knew they had to get along, at least be civil. Leo did care about the band. He didn’t want that to go down in flames. Dean was right. “I’m sorry, Castiel. I really am, even if you might not believe it.” 

The fact that Leo wasn’t over Dean Cas could understand. “I can’t do anything about you having feelings for my husband. He’s an amazing man. But you will not ever try anything like that with him again.” Cas hated looking weak right now, but he had to lean on Dean, or he’d fall to his knees. “I know how much you mean to  _ my _ husband. If you love him like you say you do, then you need to let him go. He’s made his choice.” Cas was glad that he hadn’t started losing his hair yet. That would make him look so much more weak. Cas didn’t want that. He felt stronger with Dean’s arm around his waist. The rest of the family had come out to see. And this is when Charlie arrived, with Jo Harvelle, Bobby’s fiancée’s daughter. This was shaping up to be a CW drama. 

No one moved, other than Leo getting to his feet. Then, John stepped down until he was right up next to Leo. “Look, son. You’re a great worker for Bobby and I. We need you at the shop. Especially until the band hits the big time.” John had no doubt that his son and little girl’s band was going to go places. “But you heard my son. He’s made his choice. You’ve always been there for Dean, and he’s needed that. Losing Sam was….” Here is where his voice wavers, and his wife stepped down to take his hand. Squeezing it, John was able to keep on going. “You’ve been a good friend to the family. We still need you in it. You’ve got to find a way to be okay with how things are.” 

They were all quiet a moment, and Leo left, after saying he was sorry once more, and Charlie and Jo joined everyone as they headed inside. Heading straight for Dean, whom Charlie had made fast friends, she immediately asked, “What the frak, Winchester?” She asked, Jo, though still underage, was handing the alcohol she’d brought to Cas, giving him a sly smile. She looked at Dean, who began to explain to her that Leo had made a move on him. Charlie slapped his arm lightly and playfully. “Well, dude, I don’t know why you’re so surprised. He’s been jonesing for you for years, from what Jo says.” She blushed a bit. Dean looked at her. “No! Dean, she’s jailbait. I’m not that stupid.” 

“Ellen’ll kill you, you better not.” Dean said, as he led them back into the living room. Things had started again, and Charlie moved for pizza. Dean looked at his husband, who was having a lot of fun. Dean needed him to make it through this. He’d just found him, and he loved Cas beyond all reason. He just watched for a moment, enjoying his family. This couldn’t be the last time. 

_ Talk about love, talk about trust _ _   
_ _ Talkin’ about forever baby _ _   
_ _ When you’re talkin’ about us _ _   
_ _ I give you my word, stick to my guns _ _   
_ _ Believe me when I tell you baby _ _   
_ _ That we’ve just begun _ _   
_ _ You don’t understand, no  _ _   
_ _ The full intent of my plan _

_ Baby, I wanna be your soul provider yeah _ _   
_ _ Baby, I wanna stay that way  _ _   
_ _ For the longest time _ _   
_ _ Baby I wanna be your soul provider _ _   
_ _ Just say you’ll let me  _ _   
_ _ Darlin’, I will, I will, yeah _

_ I know you’ve been hurt _ _   
_ _ I know your love’s shy _ _   
_ _ You don’t have to say it baby _ _   
_ _ It’s gonna take some time _ _   
_ _ You got my heart in the palm of your hands _ _   
_ _ Swear it’s gonna stay there baby _ _   
_ _ Give me half a chance _ _   
_ _ You don’t understand, no _ _   
_ _ The full intent of my plan  _

  
  
  


**_Author’s note: So, yeah. More Destiel WIP. Oh well. I was inspired and just wrote it. I’d’ve signed up for the BB but I don’t like having deadlines or having to plan out my fic. I go where the story takes me. Which also leads to a lot of half finished chapters or oneshots. If ya’ll are going to hang in, great. Hopefully I’ll see ya’ll soon!_ **


	2. Soul Provider

Chapter Two: Soul Provider

A couple of days later, Dean was just getting to work. Cas had no classes that day, since he was taking time off from school, and no appointments or anything. So he was home with Cory. Dean went to the locker room to put on his coveralls. When he got there, he found Leo and Ash. They looked like they’d been discussing something serious. They both stopped when they saw Dean. He took off his wedding ring, and slipped it on the chain around his neck, which also held Sam’s ring, one John had given to him when he’d turned 18. He’d not had it very long before he’d died. Dean gave them a glare. Ash seemed to have taken Leo’s side in all of this drama crap. And he knew that Ash knew that was wrong for the band, not to mention the wrong move. Leo had made a pass at Dean, who was married, with his husband going through cancer. It was stage two, so his chances of surviving were actually good, but he still could die. Dean moved to grab his coveralls. “You didn’t have to stop on my account. I know you’re gossiping about me. And Ash, you know that you siding with Leo is bullshit. Leo needs to get over me and move on. And honestly, so do you. We want the band to do well, ya’ll. So why can’t you just try and deal with it?” Dean slipped his coveralls closed, and kept his fierce, green eyed gaze on both of them, neither of them moving. But Ash at least, had the grace to look chagrined. 

Leo chose to answer. “You can’t just tell me to deal with it! I love you, Dean. I don’t know how or when it happened, but I’m in love with you. Tears gathered in Leo’s eyes. He wished he wasn’t, but he was. Leo had pulled back his long brown hair into a ponytail to keep it out of his way. He felt so cheated. Dean and Cas had gotten together with almost no courting. It had just happened. Leo hadn’t gotten the chance to tell Dean that he had feelings for him. Dean was someone that Leo hadn’t seen himself falling for. Leo was quiet for a moment. “Castiel doesn’t know about your past, does he? How you had to sell that body of yours to get money? What if I told him?” 

Closing the distance between them, Dean was very close to Leo’s face, who to his credit, looked freaked out now. Dean was forcing himself to hold back his tears or bushing. He didn’t want to appear weak, Dean was fighting hard to keep his emotions in. “You will tell my husband nothing. Do you hear me? Nothing. It’s on me to tell him, and you aren’t going to fuck up my relationship because you think that it’ll fuck up my life.” He had never been so angry in his life. Leo was supposed to be a friend. He was supposed to be one of Dean’s best friends. This was just beyond the pale. “I don’t know if I want you in the band anymore.” Dean told Leo, and could feel both his heart and Leo’s breaking. 

Dean had to take a moment before he went out onto the shop floor. He hadn’t thought about how he’d had to resort to hooking to make money in a long while. He’d mostly had male customers, not many women called for hookers. Even for men. Dean had found out then that he liked having sex with men. He had tended to lean more towards men after that. He wouldn’t ever regret getting Cory’s mother pregnant though. That little boy had changed Dean’s life for the better. Dean moved to the coffee pot to start the coffee for the morning. They offered coffee all day for people who came in to wait. He was groggy and not really awake, despite the fight, and didn’t hear his father walking up. “Hey, Dad.” 

There was something up with Dean. More than what Cas was dealing with. “Are you okay?” John asked, and Dean seemed reluctant to answer. John kept his eyes on his son, he was going to wait until Dean gave him an answer that sounded truthful. “You know me, I’ll keep asking.” Before Dean could answer, Ash and Leo had come out on to the floor, on their way to cars they were going to work on. John didn’t miss the angry look that Dean and Leo shared. “Okay. What happened with Leo?” John asked, and he knew the blame would sit with Leo. Leo had avoided John and Bobby as much as possible the past couple of days. If John could have, he’d’ve fired the punk. John had never thought it would come to this, Leo being at odds with their family. 

As soon as Ash and Leo were out of earshot, Dean spoke. “Leo was trying to blackmail me. He’s got dirt on me. Dean didn’t want to tell John about it. He’d never told John or Jody what he’d done when he was younger. Some of it hadn’t been consensual, and Dean hadn’t really dealt with it like he should have. “Please don’t make me tell you. It’s something I’m not ready to talk about.” Dean just couldn’t tell his father what he’d done, he was way too embarrassed about it. Dean had also had a drug habit. He’d been hooked on vicodin and the money he made from hooking had got it for him. Dean had managed to keep that quiet from everyone but his baby brother. Dean finished with the machine and it began to percolate. He turned to his father. “It’s something I have to tell Cas first before I tell you and Mama.” Dean definitely didn’t want to tell his baby sister. She had always looked up to him, and he didn’t want to ruin her view of him. Dean also just wasn’t proud of it, and he felt guilty. Even if he was clean now. He’d had to do it without rehab. He’d have to tell his parents, and Dean hadn’t wanted to do that. “I’ll tell you, Dad, but I have to tell Cas before anyone else knows.” Dean was so mad at Leo for even bringing it up. And in front of Ash, too. Even if Ash already knew. Ash had been a ‘client’. 

There was something about this that John didn’t like. Dean wasn’t one to keep things from him. They shared just about everything. John folded his arms. Dean looked incredibly upset. He again wondered what was going on. “You know how angry I am with that kid. I can’t believe that he pulled what he did. You are married now. It may have been what I thought was too fast, but when it’s right, it’s right.” John said, watching his son’s face. He had a pained, embarrassed expression on his face. That told John whatever Leo knew was a big deal. “You’re right, though. You _should_ tell your husband first. Don’t let Leo get to you. I don’t want to see the band or you suffer.” 

When his father said this, Dean’s green eyes filled with tears. This might implode his marriage. Dean took a deep breath and his chin wobbled. “Dad, I can’t….. I can’t lose Cas. And what Leo has it could blow up. Especially since I just told Leo I don’t know if I want him in the band anymore.” Dean knew that he shouldn’t have slept with Leo in the first place. Sam had tried to tell him at the time that he shouldn’t. He should have listened. He raked a hand through his brown hair. It was getting a little long. He needed to get a cut. With taking care of Cas, it had fallen by the wayside. He shook his head, trying to stop being so emotional. “I’m gonna get to work.” This ended it for now. 

That evening, Cas was waiting for Dean to come home. He’d just gotten a text message from Leo, telling him that Dean had been a prostitute in high school. Like that was going to change Cas’ view of him. Cas loved Dean. He knew that he’d fallen in love with Dean at first sight. And he knew Dean had with him. Nothing Leo could say was going to change that. Cory was set up in the living room, playing with blocks and reruns of  _ Rugrats  _ on. Cas was at the kitchen island, working on some homework. He was still trying to take classes despite the fact that he was in cancer treatment. His life had changed so much and none of it was something Cas would have planned or thought would happen. But he wouldn’t change one thing. Cas was extremely happy. Despite having cancer. Cory came into the kitchen, crawling onto Cas’ lap. “Hungry.” Cory told him, lifting up and touching Cas’ chin. Cas bounced the toddler on his knees. “Daddy will be home soon.” He promised him. Cas lifted him carefully (chemo was making him weaker) and filled a little bowl with some dry Cheerios. “Here, eat this. It will tide you over till Daddy gets here.” Cas told him, and Cory ran off to the living room. He called Cas ‘Pa’. Cas felt like Laura Ingalls Wilder, but he didn’t mind. He loved Cory. Cory was his son, too. He’d do anything to protect him. He was in Cas’ heart forever. 

The front door opened, and Dean came in carrying take out bags from Rufus’. He put them on the end of the island that wasn’t covered with Cas’ homework. “Got some burgers, fries, and a pie. The usual.” Dean said, and then he saw the look on Cas’ face. Dean’s own face colored and somehow, he knew that Cas  _ knew _ . Dean cursed under his breath. He moved over to Cas. “I know Leo must have told you. I’m so sorry that I didn’t. But Cas, I’m not proud of it at all.” Dean’s eyes brushed with tears. “I wasn’t proud of it, Cas. Please. I love you so much. I need you. Please don’t leave me over this.” He said, and Cas was giving him a sorrowful but slightly amused expression. Dean knew that it meant Cas wasn’t going anywhere. 

Reaching up to cup Dean’s scruffy jaw, Cas said, “I love you, Dean. I love you more than I love myself. You and Cory are my family now. And Charlie. And of course John and Jody. I’m a Winchester now. You know that.” He leaned up to kiss Dean deeply. When they broke, Cas was holding Dean’s jaw with both hands and looking into those crystal, wet green eyes. “You’re here. I’m dying, and you’re here.” They usually didn’t say the ‘dying’ word, but it  _ was _ a possibility. He held up a hand before Dean could begin to speak. “You are sticking with me while I’m going through all of this. You’ve known me less than three months. I have breast cancer. I’m a man, dealing with breast cancer. You haven’t gone anywhere. You think I’m going to leave you for that?” 

A look of relief passed over Dean’s worried face. “I love you so much, Cas, babe.” He told him, and leaned to kiss him. “Hey, Core, Daddy brought home dinner!” He called out to his son, and the pitter patter of tiny feet ran up to them, lifting his hands up to Dean. Dean hoisted his son onto his hip, and Cas had already begun getting out the food. Cas had gotten a chicken salad sandwich and a side of carrot sticks, Dean had a bacon cheeseburger and fries, and Cory had chicken strips and fries. All three of them had chocolate/vanilla shakes. Rufus made the best ones in town. Dean threw Cory up in the air playfully, and then put him in his high chair. 

Cas got out some plates, it was kind of soothing for him to have something to clean up every day. Even if it could tire him out on chemo days. Dean tried to get him to relax and not doing anything that would tire him out or make him feel ill. Cas couldn’t help it. He just wasn’t used to being idle in any capacity. He put them on the side of the island that they ate on, and Dean just smirked at Cas. Cas stuck his own tongue out at him, and grabbed more napkins. And some ranch, Cory liked ranch on his chicken  _ and _ his fries. They didn’t really restrict him too much on what he ate. He was so young, and walked and ran all over the house. Dean wasn’t a type to do the organic thing. 

Dinner passed with talking about unimportant topics, since Cory was there. Dean knew they might have a more serious talk once Cory was in bed. Dean thought it would be good to get some of all of this guilt off himself. Dean went to change into pjs, Cas was putting Cory to bed. They took turns. Cory liked Cas to do it the most, apparently he read books the best. His voices were better. Dean didn’t take offense to it. He was in the living room, he’d cut pieces of chocolate pie for him and Cas. Now he was filling a vape pen full of weed for them. Cas had a script for pain, so they had a good connection. Although Ash was a grower, and Dean did supplement his stuff. As he was finishing, Cas came down, wearing Denton High shorts that were Dean’s. No shirt, and Dean grinned. “Hey, sexy.” He said. He accepted the kiss it, as Cas dug into his pie. Dean hit the vape twice, and coughing, passed it to Cas. “So, my hooking.” Dean said slowly. He just wanted to get it over with. “I was… I spent some time when I was addicted to vicodin. Dad had gotten injured at work, and I ended up taking one after I’d gotten into a fight with these douchebags.” He took the vape when Cas handed it to him. “It set off this addiction. The shop wasn’t doing great at the time, and Dad had to take time off. Any money that they knew I was making I kicked in to help. So, I turned to hooking to get money to buy the vics.” He handed the vape back. “I never told them, I just quit cold turkey. Some of the sex wasn’t… it was forced.” 

Leaning out, Cas touched Dean’s knee. “Bae, I am so sorry.” Cas had never been through something like that. Other than with Constantine. They hadn’t had anything from him since his first attack, and now Cas was worried about what he was doing. If his plan was psychological. Then he forced himself to focus on what Dean had told him. “So, do you want to talk anymore about it? Because it won’t change how I feel about you. I love you. That won’t change. I admire that you managed to kick your habit. Most people wouldn’t be as strong as you.” He moved to refresh the weed in the vape. “You are so brave, and so strong. You and Cory are all I need.” 

Dean leaned out and kissed him, and then hit the vape before cleaning it out. “Gonna get some more pie and chips.” He told his husband, and after kissing him again, headed for the kitchen. On his way, there was a ring of the doorbell. Confused, Dean headed to get it. When he opened the door, and dropped the paper plate he was holding. Cas’ brother Gabriel’s head was sitting on the porch. Dean knew this was Constantine, and he knew Cas was going to flip. Gabriel lived in Houston, so they only spoke on the phone and saw each other every few weekends until Cas had gotten sick. Dean took a deep breath and called to Cas, telling him to bring his phone, and to brace himself. Dean couldn’t take his eyes off it. 

When Cas got to Dean, and he saw his brother’s head on the porch, he knees went weak and he fell to the floor. Dean was instantly by his side, an arm around him as he dialed 911. Cas was trying to breathe as he turned and buried his head in Dean’s neck. He couldn’t believe that Connie had done this. Cas was going to have to tell Charlie. The rest of Cas’ family was gone. His parents and his oldest brother Michael had all died in a car crash when Cas was thirteen. Gabriel had been 22, had raised Cas after that. He’d been more of a parent than his actual parents had been. Cas sobbed into Dean’s neck, and Dean stroked Cas’ arm as he spoke to the 911 operator. Cas couldn’t believe this. That it had gone this far. He and Constantine had gone on  _ two  _ dates.  _ Two _ . Why was he  _ doing  _ this? “Oh, Gabe.” Cas moaned, as he clutched to Dean like a life vest. It seemed like forever for the cops to get there, but really, it was just about ten minutes. Cas was nearly hysterical, and he didn’t want to have to talk to the cops. He took one of his tranquilizers, and they moved to the kitchen, Dean making him some cocoa. Cas had reluctantly let him go to do so. While Cas was explaining that this was related to Constantine, and told them that he’d already left an animal heart, Dean called Jody to let them know what was going on. He didn’t leave the room to do it, because Cas  _ needed _ to be able to see him. The officer took very detailed notes once he knew Cas’ mother in law was Jody. She got there quickly, she’d been at home. “Mama!” Cas cried out, and she ran to him. 

When Dean saw his mom get there, he felt a lot of relief. Despite the fact that he was an adult with a family of his own, he still really relied on his parents. Even if it wasn’t something he’d admit out loud. Dean moved to sit next to his husband, and as he did, Cas leaning into him, his eye caught John making his way inside, carrying take out bags from Taco Bell. The beverages were Baha Blast slushees. Dean got up and hugged his father tightly. His father always knew what to do in a crisis. And Dean was sure that John knew they would have been baked from smoking. Cas’ pain from the cancer treatments was an almost every day issue, even though his chemo was only three days a week. 

John knew that Dean was thankful without him having to say so out loud. He handed the food and drink to his son, and then noticed the look on Cas’ face. He very clearly wanted a hug from John as well. He moved to his son in law, and Cas gratefully threw his arms around him. John hugged him tightly. “It’s going to be okay, Castiel.” He said, he usually called him by his full name. He rubbed Cas’ back. “I’m sorry for you. I know how close you and your brother were.” John had only met Gabriel twice in the time he’d known Cas. Gabriel had seemed to be a very good man, and he had doted on Cas a lot. Since they hadn’t gotten to see each other much, he’d sent money to him every week. John had admired that, that Gabriel still took care of Cas. 

Holding on, Cas let himself cry. He felt completely safe with Dean, he felt even safer with John. “Thanks for being here, Dad.” Cas said, and stepped back. He’d heard Dean telling him to eat his tacos. Cas took a long sip of his drink first. He still felt shaky. “I’m a billionaire now.” Cas mumbled, and his family looked at him in surprise. “Didn’t I ever tell you I come from money? I did help pay for this home.” It hadn’t been very expensive at all, it had been a foreclosure home that the bank had to unload. “The rest of the family money now comes to me.” Cas wondered if he should keep going to college like he was still trying to do right now. He could take time off, and go back when he wasn’t sick anymore, like Dean had been begging him to do.

“Babe, you  _ need _ to take a break from school, okay? You’re sick, Gabe… you need to be getting as much rest as you can.” He told his husband. Dean finished a taco and pulled out another. “Please, for me, okay?” He asked, reaching out and cupping Cas’ jaw. He looked into Cas’ eyes for a long moment, until Cas had agreed. Dean let out a sigh of relief and then took a sip of his drink. Jody was outside, making sure the CSI and cops were handling things correctly. Dean loved her, but especially right now. She knew what to say to get them to do their best. There wasn’t a  _ lot  _ of homophobia in Denton, but there was some. This wouldn’t be mishandled because of Jody. Even though she couldn’t really work it, even being the sheriff. And Dean knew how much this was going to kill her. She wanted to bring that guy to justice. 

There were the pitter patter of little feet, and Cory came in. “Grandpa!” He cried out, and ran to John. Cas stood and went to his son. “Cory, why are you awake, honey?” His son’s reply was that he’d heard noises. John said he’d go put him back to bed, and did so, after both Cas and Dean kissed him goodnight. Cas cuddled up to his husband and stayed that way until everyone was gone. Dean lifted Cas in his arms and headed to their bedroom. Cas clutched Dean tightly as Dean laid his husband on the bed. Dean told him to hang on, he was going to go check on Cory. Cas sniffled and tugged Dean down for a kiss before he let him go. Cas curled into a ball on the bed while he waited for Dean. 

Dean poked his head in on their son, who was now sleeping, snoring away. He walked in, and kissed his forehead, and made sure the blanket covered him. He knew the kid was out like a light, John was good at putting people to sleep. He left the room, and went back to his own bedroom. He got into the bed, and Cas immediately cuddled up to him, an arm slinging around Dean’s waist, and buried his head in Dean’s chest. Dean reached to stroke Cas’ back. They didn’t have to speak. Dean knew Cas just needed him to be there. Cas was asleep within a couple of minutes, it had been a very long day, and he was already weak from the chemo. Dean wondered why this guy had chosen Cas for his crazy bullshit. It seemed very nonsensical. 

The next couple of weeks went by in a blur. Cas was still going through chemo, but they were close to shrinking the lump so they could remove it. Cas was at home with Cory, who was playing with his cars on the living room floor. Dean was on his way home from work, again bringing home takeout. He hadn’t told Cas from where. Cas was reading a book. Adjusting to life without Gabe had been hard. Cas was used to Skype calls every week. Which had been replaced with weekend visits. Cas had done as Dean had suggested, taking some time off school. Cas really hoped he’d get to go back. They hadn’t talked more about Dean’s past hooking, and Cas hoped it wasn’t dredging up bad memories for his husband. It was the last thing that he wanted. He turned a page in his novel, as Dean got home, calling out that he’d brought home Chipotle. Cas got up, and Cory ran ahead, shouting “Daddy!” as he went. Cas reached the kitchen, and moved to kiss Dean. He’d meant a soft kiss, but Dean tugged him closer and kissed him deeper. A moan escaped Cas, and he very much wished Cory was at his grandparents’ so he could have Dean right then and there. “I missed you, Dean.” Cas said, his voice low so only Dean would hear him. Cas said it against Dean’s lips, and those emerald green eyes lit up in response. It was hard these days for Cas to have the energy to have sex. Cas moved to bite Dean’s earlobe gently. “After Cory goes to sleep.” He said, his voice barely above a whisper. Dean’s whole body shivered, and he gave Cas a sly grin. Cas grinned back at him and moved to sit with Cory at the table. 

Dean filled plates with tacos and burritos. He’d gotten Cory a chicken bowl, he wasn’t one to like tacos, corn or flour. He got out some sodas and an apple juice for Cory. He pulled his own plate to him and sat down next to Cas. He’d been looking forward to this day. It was the best, being home with Cas and Cory. Dean was trying to think about that, than what had happened at work. He’d gotten into a fight with Leo. He’d told Leo that he was angry with him for telling Cas about his hooking days. That should have been something Dean got to do himself. It wasn’t funny that Leo was still trying to come between them. Dean ate half of one of his tacos in one bite, and chewed. Cas and Cory were talking about  _ My Little Pony _ , which they loved to watch together. His husband and son were total bronies. He thought it was adorable. Plus, it gave them something to bond about. Dean loved that they were bonding about something. He felt Cory’s brown eyes on him, and he gave his son a sly smile. “What’s up, kiddo?” He asked, once his mouth was free of taco. Cory asked if he could have some ice cream when he was done eating. Dean pretended to think it over, but he gave his son a smile. “Yeah, one scoop.” He told him, and Cory grinned wide, showing his clear white baby teeth growing in. “I know you were good for Pa, so you deserve a reward.” Dean told him, as he got up to get another soda. He tried not to drink until Cory was asleep or not home. He might have  _ a _ beer, but that was it. 

About an hour later, Cory was asleep at John and Jody’s. Dean was glad they lived so close to family. Now he and Cas were in their underwear on the couch, a pitcher of margaritas and vanilla ice cream in front of them. Dean was enjoying his ice cream with strawberry margarita on the top of it. Cas was wearing one of Dean’s high school wrestling tee shirts and a pair of boxer briefs with Spongebob on them. Dean was wearing a pair of ladies’ hipsters, bright red and silky satin. With nothing else. Dean and Cas were entangled together on the couch, Netflix on tv. Cas had turned on  _ Community _ . They were rewatching it together. Dean was already halfway wasted, and he blurted out, “Cas, I love you. No matter what Leo Webb says.” 

At the loud outburst, Cas turned to look at his husband. “I love you too, Dean. What happened at work today?” He could tell that something had, Dean had been quiet since he’d gotten home. “I know something’s up. You don’t have to tell me, but you know that you can tell me anything. I will still love you.” He hated when things happened at work that caused Dean to be upset. Cas  _ really _ wanted to tell Leo off, maybe kiss his ass a bit, but that wouldn’t be for awhile. Moving around a lot was still something he wasn’t able to really do. He ate his ice cream slowly, and had drank only one cup of the margaritas. You weren’t supposed to drink on one of the meds he was taking. Although the weed was going to be readied as soon as Dean was done eating his ice cream. Cas leaned out to kiss him tenderly. 

This didn’t surprise Dean, that Cas knew he was buggin’ about something. He sighed. “Got into a fight with Leo.” Dean’s voice was quiet and small. “I don’t know where his bravado is coming from.” John had already made it clear that his job was in danger. Dean had put up an ad for a new drummer in the paper. Dean’s heart was broken, because he was losing Leo as a friend. They’d been friends since grade school. Dean moved to start filling up a vape pen for them to smoke. It helped with Cas’ pain. Dean really hoped they’d get the tumor shrunk enough so they could take it out. Dean couldn’t lose Cas. “Dad already warned him twice.” He paused to clear his throat. “He’s going to lose his job if he doesn’t stop his bullshit. I put an ad for a new drummer in the paper.” Dean put the weed in the grinder. He ground it as he went to keep speaking. “Dad almost hit him the other day. He, Leo, that is, was in my face about picking you when I barely knew you. I was trying my best to ignore him and keep working. Dad, though, he was pissed as  _ fuck _ . If Uncle Bobby hadn’t gotten Dad away from him, he would have laid Leo out. I just, I miss being able to be friends with him. I’ve known him my whole life.” Dean finished with the vape and handed it off to Cas to hit it first. Dean moved to pour himself another drink and took a deep sip. He was going to be  _ so _ hungover the next morning. It was justified. 

Taking a deep hit of the vape, Cas looked at his husband. Dean was already totally wasted. Not that he blamed him. Dean had liked Gabriel. And with Leo Webb aside, it reminded Dean of losing Sam. And they were already dealing with so much. It was amazing Dean wasn’t falling down drunk every day. Cas reached to hand him the vape, and his fingers brushed Dean’s. He held on tightly. Dean lifted his eyes to Cas’ blue ones. Cas squeezed his fingers. “You’ve got so much on your shoulders. And you’ve never once complained. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I love you so so so much. I don’t know what brought us together, but I thank God every day that it happened. We’re doing better than a lot of couples. We’re going to make it through all of this. I don’t know how, but I know that we are. Because we love each other.” Cas went to coughing and drank some water. He was done with the booze. Dean pounded on him on his back to help. “I don’t know how it’ll work out, I just know that it will.” Cas loved Dean with all of his heart. Cas wouldn’t say it out loud, but he was so so scared of dying. Not from Constantine, he was sure Jody would catch him. But from the cancer. It was in his family, but no male family member had ever gotten it. Why did he have to be the first? And why did he have to lose Gabriel? He loved his brother, and he was the only one who supported Cas’ sexuality. But Connie knew that, and had been counting on it. Cas couldn’t get the sight of Gabe’s head out of his mind. 

Hitting the vape, Dean could tell Cas had something on his mind. He wondered if it was about his brother or the cancer. Dean was sure it was both. “You dealing with Gabe okay?” He sipped his drink again, and he knew what the  _ real _ answer was. Dean was  _ still  _ messed up about Sam, years later. Not a  _ lot _ of years, but he knew how Cas was feeling. Dean knew they also needed to talk about the cancer. They hadn’t yet. Cas was trying to act as if everything was normal. Which Dean thought he kind of got. It was something huge and scary. Dean slid a hand through his floppy brown hair (Cas liked it a little bit longer) and reached to take the vape from Cas when he passed it. 

Cas knew why Dean had chosen to ask that particular question. He didn’t want to talk about the cancer, either. Cas toyed with the plastic spoon he’d used to eat his ice cream. “I just, I keep thinking this is all my fault. I know it’s not. It’s Connie’s fault. But this obsessed with  _ me _ . If I hadn’t gone out with him, Gabe would still be alive. He was the only one in my family who accepted me for who I am.” Cas’ blue eyes brushed with tears. “Zachariah, Michael, Anna, my parents, they all tossed me aside.” Dean knew this, those were Cas’ siblings. Cas hadn’t heard from them in years, and his parents were dead. Cas sniffled as he accepted the vape back from Dean. “I wish I could take it all back. Never give Conne the time of day.” 

Scooting closer to Cas, Dean pressed his lips to his and cupped Cas’ scruffy jaw in his hand. His eyes bored into Cas’ blue ones. “None of this is your fault, babe. You couldn’t know how this guy was going to react. You got the feeling he was creepy, so you ended it. None of this is on you.” Dean would give  _ anything _ to be able to kill this guy for what he had done. But Dean knew that Cas and Cory both needed him. He kissed Cas again, slowly and tenderly. “You don’t have to worry about anything anymore. You know this. I’m going to protect you with my life.” Dean pulled Cas into his lap. Cas’ arms went around Dean’s neck. Dean’s arms slid around Cas’ waist. He rubbed Cas’ back, his hands settling on the small of it. 

Cas felt at home in Dean’s arms. He could feel Dean’s cock against his, and he began to roll his hips. Dean let out a surprised gasp, but he leaned out to kiss Cas. They both moved against each other, cocks rubbing together through their underwear. Cas gasped as he came after only a few rolls. It also surprised him that Dean came a few moments after he did. Cas kissed him, deeply, and didn’t even care that they were both sticky with cum. Cas let his fingers play in the hair at the nape of Dean’s neck, earning him a soft moan from his husband. They stayed like that, just kissing, for about an hour or so. Cas could stay like this forever. He buried his head in Dean’s neck and took a deep sniff. He was glad that he had Dean. Hr wouldn’t know how to get through any of this without him. 

_ We didn’t know what hit us _ _   
_ _ We had to stop and catch a breath _ _   
_ _ Like a brick wall in a train tunnel  _ _   
_ _ Only scared us half to death  _

_ You’d have thought we could’ve seen it coming _ _   
_ _ The way the two of us were runnin’  _ _   
_ _ But I guess that’s the way it is  _ _   
_ _ If you’ve never been  _ _   
  
_

_ Hit by love, struck by lightening _ _   
_ _ Bound forever, there’s no denying _ _   
_ _ That all we want is everything that makes  _ _   
_ _ Love like this come true _

_ Oh, emotionally on our knees _ _   
_ _ It took a moment to believe _ _   
_ _ But there we were, the two of us, hit by love _

_ Looking back is easy if you’ve got memories like ours _ _   
_ _ We crashed like two headlights and we’re still seeing stars _

_ And I don’t want to stop and wonder where we’ll find  _ _   
_ _ That rollin’ thunder ‘cause my heart knows you and me _ _   
_ _ Are always gonna be _

  
  
**_Author’s note: So, this should have been up weeks ago. Sorry for the delay. You can thank all the Cockles on my dash for this update. Got all of the feels, and I had to get them out. Sorry for the angst and death. I’m sure more is coming. Angst, that is. I’m not planning more death. I didn’t plan Gabe’s. Was also inspired by this great Destiel fic_ ** _ Start of Something Good _ **_. Check it out. Anyway, hanging in! Hope to update again soon._ **

Chapter Two: Soul Provider

A couple of days later, Dean was just getting to work. Cas had no classes that day, since he was taking time off from school, and no appointments or anything. So he was home with Cory. Dean went to the locker room to put on his coveralls. When he got there, he found Leo and Ash. They looked like they’d been discussing something serious. They both stopped when they saw Dean. He took off his wedding ring, and slipped it on the chain around his neck, which also held Sam’s ring, one John had given to him when he’d turned 18. He’d not had it very long before he’d died. Dean gave them a glare. Ash seemed to have taken Leo’s side in all of this drama crap. And he knew that Ash knew that was wrong for the band, not to mention the wrong move. Leo had made a pass at Dean, who was married, with his husband going through cancer. It was stage two, so his chances of surviving were actually good, but he still could die. Dean moved to grab his coveralls. “You didn’t have to stop on my account. I know you’re gossiping about me. And Ash, you know that you siding with Leo is bullshit. Leo needs to get over me and move on. And honestly, so do you. We want the band to do well, ya’ll. So why can’t you just try and deal with it?” Dean slipped his coveralls closed, and kept his fierce, green eyed gaze on both of them, neither of them moving. But Ash at least, had the grace to look chagrined. 

Leo chose to answer. “You can’t just tell me to deal with it! I love you, Dean. I don’t know how or when it happened, but I’m in love with you. Tears gathered in Leo’s eyes. He wished he wasn’t, but he was. Leo had pulled back his long brown hair into a ponytail to keep it out of his way. He felt so cheated. Dean and Cas had gotten together with almost no courting. It had just happened. Leo hadn’t gotten the chance to tell Dean that he had feelings for him. Dean was someone that Leo hadn’t seen himself falling for. Leo was quiet for a moment. “Castiel doesn’t know about your past, does he? How you had to sell that body of yours to get money? What if I told him?” 

Closing the distance between them, Dean was very close to Leo’s face, who to his credit, looked freaked out now. Dean was forcing himself to hold back his tears or bushing. He didn’t want to appear weak, Dean was fighting hard to keep his emotions in. “You will tell my husband nothing. Do you hear me? Nothing. It’s on me to tell him, and you aren’t going to fuck up my relationship because you think that it’ll fuck up my life.” He had never been so angry in his life. Leo was supposed to be a friend. He was supposed to be one of Dean’s best friends. This was just beyond the pale. “I don’t know if I want you in the band anymore.” Dean told Leo, and could feel both his heart and Leo’s breaking. 

Dean had to take a moment before he went out onto the shop floor. He hadn’t thought about how he’d had to resort to hooking to make money in a long while. He’d mostly had male customers, not many women called for hookers. Even for men. Dean had found out then that he liked having sex with men. He had tended to lean more towards men after that. He wouldn’t ever regret getting Cory’s mother pregnant though. That little boy had changed Dean’s life for the better. Dean moved to the coffee pot to start the coffee for the morning. They offered coffee all day for people who came in to wait. He was groggy and not really awake, despite the fight, and didn’t hear his father walking up. “Hey, Dad.” 

There was something up with Dean. More than what Cas was dealing with. “Are you okay?” John asked, and Dean seemed reluctant to answer. John kept his eyes on his son, he was going to wait until Dean gave him an answer that sounded truthful. “You know me, I’ll keep asking.” Before Dean could answer, Ash and Leo had come out on to the floor, on their way to cars they were going to work on. John didn’t miss the angry look that Dean and Leo shared. “Okay. What happened with Leo?” John asked, and he knew the blame would sit with Leo. Leo had avoided John and Bobby as much as possible the past couple of days. If John could have, he’d’ve fired the punk. John had never thought it would come to this, Leo being at odds with their family. 

As soon as Ash and Leo were out of earshot, Dean spoke. “Leo was trying to blackmail me. He’s got dirt on me. Dean didn’t want to tell John about it. He’d never told John or Jody what he’d done when he was younger. Some of it hadn’t been consensual, and Dean hadn’t really dealt with it like he should have. “Please don’t make me tell you. It’s something I’m not ready to talk about.” Dean just couldn’t tell his father what he’d done, he was way too embarrassed about it. Dean had also had a drug habit. He’d been hooked on vicodin and the money he made from hooking had got it for him. Dean had managed to keep that quiet from everyone but his baby brother. Dean finished with the machine and it began to percolate. He turned to his father. “It’s something I have to tell Cas first before I tell you and Mama.” Dean definitely didn’t want to tell his baby sister. She had always looked up to him, and he didn’t want to ruin her view of him. Dean also just wasn’t proud of it, and he felt guilty. Even if he was clean now. He’d had to do it without rehab. He’d have to tell his parents, and Dean hadn’t wanted to do that. “I’ll tell you, Dad, but I have to tell Cas before anyone else knows.” Dean was so mad at Leo for even bringing it up. And in front of Ash, too. Even if Ash already knew. Ash had been a ‘client’. 

There was something about this that John didn’t like. Dean wasn’t one to keep things from him. They shared just about everything. John folded his arms. Dean looked incredibly upset. He again wondered what was going on. “You know how angry I am with that kid. I can’t believe that he pulled what he did. You are married now. It may have been what I thought was too fast, but when it’s right, it’s right.” John said, watching his son’s face. He had a pained, embarrassed expression on his face. That told John whatever Leo knew was a big deal. “You’re right, though. You _should_ tell your husband first. Don’t let Leo get to you. I don’t want to see the band or you suffer.” 

When his father said this, Dean’s green eyes filled with tears. This might implode his marriage. Dean took a deep breath and his chin wobbled. “Dad, I can’t….. I can’t lose Cas. And what Leo has it could blow up. Especially since I just told Leo I don’t know if I want him in the band anymore.” Dean knew that he shouldn’t have slept with Leo in the first place. Sam had tried to tell him at the time that he shouldn’t. He should have listened. He raked a hand through his brown hair. It was getting a little long. He needed to get a cut. With taking care of Cas, it had fallen by the wayside. He shook his head, trying to stop being so emotional. “I’m gonna get to work.” This ended it for now. 

That evening, Cas was waiting for Dean to come home. He’d just gotten a text message from Leo, telling him that Dean had been a prostitute in high school. Like that was going to change Cas’ view of him. Cas loved Dean. He knew that he’d fallen in love with Dean at first sight. And he knew Dean had with him. Nothing Leo could say was going to change that. Cory was set up in the living room, playing with blocks and reruns of  _ Rugrats  _ on. Cas was at the kitchen island, working on some homework. He was still trying to take classes despite the fact that he was in cancer treatment. His life had changed so much and none of it was something Cas would have planned or thought would happen. But he wouldn’t change one thing. Cas was extremely happy. Despite having cancer. Cory came into the kitchen, crawling onto Cas’ lap. “Hungry.” Cory told him, lifting up and touching Cas’ chin. Cas bounced the toddler on his knees. “Daddy will be home soon.” He promised him. Cas lifted him carefully (chemo was making him weaker) and filled a little bowl with some dry Cheerios. “Here, eat this. It will tide you over till Daddy gets here.” Cas told him, and Cory ran off to the living room. He called Cas ‘Pa’. Cas felt like Laura Ingalls Wilder, but he didn’t mind. He loved Cory. Cory was his son, too. He’d do anything to protect him. He was in Cas’ heart forever. 

The front door opened, and Dean came in carrying take out bags from Rufus’. He put them on the end of the island that wasn’t covered with Cas’ homework. “Got some burgers, fries, and a pie. The usual.” Dean said, and then he saw the look on Cas’ face. Dean’s own face colored and somehow, he knew that Cas  _ knew _ . Dean cursed under his breath. He moved over to Cas. “I know Leo must have told you. I’m so sorry that I didn’t. But Cas, I’m not proud of it at all.” Dean’s eyes brushed with tears. “I wasn’t proud of it, Cas. Please. I love you so much. I need you. Please don’t leave me over this.” He said, and Cas was giving him a sorrowful but slightly amused expression. Dean knew that it meant Cas wasn’t going anywhere. 

Reaching up to cup Dean’s scruffy jaw, Cas said, “I love you, Dean. I love you more than I love myself. You and Cory are my family now. And Charlie. And of course John and Jody. I’m a Winchester now. You know that.” He leaned up to kiss Dean deeply. When they broke, Cas was holding Dean’s jaw with both hands and looking into those crystal, wet green eyes. “You’re here. I’m dying, and you’re here.” They usually didn’t say the ‘dying’ word, but it  _ was _ a possibility. He held up a hand before Dean could begin to speak. “You are sticking with me while I’m going through all of this. You’ve known me less than three months. I have breast cancer. I’m a man, dealing with breast cancer. You haven’t gone anywhere. You think I’m going to leave you for that?” 

A look of relief passed over Dean’s worried face. “I love you so much, Cas, babe.” He told him, and leaned to kiss him. “Hey, Core, Daddy brought home dinner!” He called out to his son, and the pitter patter of tiny feet ran up to them, lifting his hands up to Dean. Dean hoisted his son onto his hip, and Cas had already begun getting out the food. Cas had gotten a chicken salad sandwich and a side of carrot sticks, Dean had a bacon cheeseburger and fries, and Cory had chicken strips and fries. All three of them had chocolate/vanilla shakes. Rufus made the best ones in town. Dean threw Cory up in the air playfully, and then put him in his high chair. 

Cas got out some plates, it was kind of soothing for him to have something to clean up every day. Even if it could tire him out on chemo days. Dean tried to get him to relax and not doing anything that would tire him out or make him feel ill. Cas couldn’t help it. He just wasn’t used to being idle in any capacity. He put them on the side of the island that they ate on, and Dean just smirked at Cas. Cas stuck his own tongue out at him, and grabbed more napkins. And some ranch, Cory liked ranch on his chicken  _ and _ his fries. They didn’t really restrict him too much on what he ate. He was so young, and walked and ran all over the house. Dean wasn’t a type to do the organic thing. 

Dinner passed with talking about unimportant topics, since Cory was there. Dean knew they might have a more serious talk once Cory was in bed. Dean thought it would be good to get some of all of this guilt off himself. Dean went to change into pjs, Cas was putting Cory to bed. They took turns. Cory liked Cas to do it the most, apparently he read books the best. His voices were better. Dean didn’t take offense to it. He was in the living room, he’d cut pieces of chocolate pie for him and Cas. Now he was filling a vape pen full of weed for them. Cas had a script for pain, so they had a good connection. Although Ash was a grower, and Dean did supplement his stuff. As he was finishing, Cas came down, wearing Denton High shorts that were Dean’s. No shirt, and Dean grinned. “Hey, sexy.” He said. He accepted the kiss it, as Cas dug into his pie. Dean hit the vape twice, and coughing, passed it to Cas. “So, my hooking.” Dean said slowly. He just wanted to get it over with. “I was… I spent some time when I was addicted to vicodin. Dad had gotten injured at work, and I ended up taking one after I’d gotten into a fight with these douchebags.” He took the vape when Cas handed it to him. “It set off this addiction. The shop wasn’t doing great at the time, and Dad had to take time off. Any money that they knew I was making I kicked in to help. So, I turned to hooking to get money to buy the vics.” He handed the vape back. “I never told them, I just quit cold turkey. Some of the sex wasn’t… it was forced.” 

Leaning out, Cas touched Dean’s knee. “Bae, I am so sorry.” Cas had never been through something like that. Other than with Constantine. They hadn’t had anything from him since his first attack, and now Cas was worried about what he was doing. If his plan was psychological. Then he forced himself to focus on what Dean had told him. “So, do you want to talk anymore about it? Because it won’t change how I feel about you. I love you. That won’t change. I admire that you managed to kick your habit. Most people wouldn’t be as strong as you.” He moved to refresh the weed in the vape. “You are so brave, and so strong. You and Cory are all I need.” 

Dean leaned out and kissed him, and then hit the vape before cleaning it out. “Gonna get some more pie and chips.” He told his husband, and after kissing him again, headed for the kitchen. On his way, there was a ring of the doorbell. Confused, Dean headed to get it. When he opened the door, and dropped the paper plate he was holding. Cas’ brother Gabriel’s head was sitting on the porch. Dean knew this was Constantine, and he knew Cas was going to flip. Gabriel lived in Houston, so they only spoke on the phone and saw each other every few weekends until Cas had gotten sick. Dean took a deep breath and called to Cas, telling him to bring his phone, and to brace himself. Dean couldn’t take his eyes off it. 

When Cas got to Dean, and he saw his brother’s head on the porch, he knees went weak and he fell to the floor. Dean was instantly by his side, an arm around him as he dialed 911. Cas was trying to breathe as he turned and buried his head in Dean’s neck. He couldn’t believe that Connie had done this. Cas was going to have to tell Charlie. The rest of Cas’ family was gone. His parents and his oldest brother Michael had all died in a car crash when Cas was thirteen. Gabriel had been 22, had raised Cas after that. He’d been more of a parent than his actual parents had been. Cas sobbed into Dean’s neck, and Dean stroked Cas’ arm as he spoke to the 911 operator. Cas couldn’t believe this. That it had gone this far. He and Constantine had gone on  _ two  _ dates.  _ Two _ . Why was he  _ doing  _ this? “Oh, Gabe.” Cas moaned, as he clutched to Dean like a life vest. It seemed like forever for the cops to get there, but really, it was just about ten minutes. Cas was nearly hysterical, and he didn’t want to have to talk to the cops. He took one of his tranquilizers, and they moved to the kitchen, Dean making him some cocoa. Cas had reluctantly let him go to do so. While Cas was explaining that this was related to Constantine, and told them that he’d already left an animal heart, Dean called Jody to let them know what was going on. He didn’t leave the room to do it, because Cas  _ needed _ to be able to see him. The officer took very detailed notes once he knew Cas’ mother in law was Jody. She got there quickly, she’d been at home. “Mama!” Cas cried out, and she ran to him. 

When Dean saw his mom get there, he felt a lot of relief. Despite the fact that he was an adult with a family of his own, he still really relied on his parents. Even if it wasn’t something he’d admit out loud. Dean moved to sit next to his husband, and as he did, Cas leaning into him, his eye caught John making his way inside, carrying take out bags from Taco Bell. The beverages were Baha Blast slushees. Dean got up and hugged his father tightly. His father always knew what to do in a crisis. And Dean was sure that John knew they would have been baked from smoking. Cas’ pain from the cancer treatments was an almost every day issue, even though his chemo was only three days a week. 

John knew that Dean was thankful without him having to say so out loud. He handed the food and drink to his son, and then noticed the look on Cas’ face. He very clearly wanted a hug from John as well. He moved to his son in law, and Cas gratefully threw his arms around him. John hugged him tightly. “It’s going to be okay, Castiel.” He said, he usually called him by his full name. He rubbed Cas’ back. “I’m sorry for you. I know how close you and your brother were.” John had only met Gabriel twice in the time he’d known Cas. Gabriel had seemed to be a very good man, and he had doted on Cas a lot. Since they hadn’t gotten to see each other much, he’d sent money to him every week. John had admired that, that Gabriel still took care of Cas. 

Holding on, Cas let himself cry. He felt completely safe with Dean, he felt even safer with John. “Thanks for being here, Dad.” Cas said, and stepped back. He’d heard Dean telling him to eat his tacos. Cas took a long sip of his drink first. He still felt shaky. “I’m a billionaire now.” Cas mumbled, and his family looked at him in surprise. “Didn’t I ever tell you I come from money? I did help pay for this home.” It hadn’t been very expensive at all, it had been a foreclosure home that the bank had to unload. “The rest of the family money now comes to me.” Cas wondered if he should keep going to college like he was still trying to do right now. He could take time off, and go back when he wasn’t sick anymore, like Dean had been begging him to do.

“Babe, you  _ need _ to take a break from school, okay? You’re sick, Gabe… you need to be getting as much rest as you can.” He told his husband. Dean finished a taco and pulled out another. “Please, for me, okay?” He asked, reaching out and cupping Cas’ jaw. He looked into Cas’ eyes for a long moment, until Cas had agreed. Dean let out a sigh of relief and then took a sip of his drink. Jody was outside, making sure the CSI and cops were handling things correctly. Dean loved her, but especially right now. She knew what to say to get them to do their best. There wasn’t a  _ lot  _ of homophobia in Denton, but there was some. This wouldn’t be mishandled because of Jody. Even though she couldn’t really work it, even being the sheriff. And Dean knew how much this was going to kill her. She wanted to bring that guy to justice. 

There were the pitter patter of little feet, and Cory came in. “Grandpa!” He cried out, and ran to John. Cas stood and went to his son. “Cory, why are you awake, honey?” His son’s reply was that he’d heard noises. John said he’d go put him back to bed, and did so, after both Cas and Dean kissed him goodnight. Cas cuddled up to his husband and stayed that way until everyone was gone. Dean lifted Cas in his arms and headed to their bedroom. Cas clutched Dean tightly as Dean laid his husband on the bed. Dean told him to hang on, he was going to go check on Cory. Cas sniffled and tugged Dean down for a kiss before he let him go. Cas curled into a ball on the bed while he waited for Dean. 

Dean poked his head in on their son, who was now sleeping, snoring away. He walked in, and kissed his forehead, and made sure the blanket covered him. He knew the kid was out like a light, John was good at putting people to sleep. He left the room, and went back to his own bedroom. He got into the bed, and Cas immediately cuddled up to him, an arm slinging around Dean’s waist, and buried his head in Dean’s chest. Dean reached to stroke Cas’ back. They didn’t have to speak. Dean knew Cas just needed him to be there. Cas was asleep within a couple of minutes, it had been a very long day, and he was already weak from the chemo. Dean wondered why this guy had chosen Cas for his crazy bullshit. It seemed very nonsensical. 

The next couple of weeks went by in a blur. Cas was still going through chemo, but they were close to shrinking the lump so they could remove it. Cas was at home with Cory, who was playing with his cars on the living room floor. Dean was on his way home from work, again bringing home takeout. He hadn’t told Cas from where. Cas was reading a book. Adjusting to life without Gabe had been hard. Cas was used to Skype calls every week. Which had been replaced with weekend visits. Cas had done as Dean had suggested, taking some time off school. Cas really hoped he’d get to go back. They hadn’t talked more about Dean’s past hooking, and Cas hoped it wasn’t dredging up bad memories for his husband. It was the last thing that he wanted. He turned a page in his novel, as Dean got home, calling out that he’d brought home Chipotle. Cas got up, and Cory ran ahead, shouting “Daddy!” as he went. Cas reached the kitchen, and moved to kiss Dean. He’d meant a soft kiss, but Dean tugged him closer and kissed him deeper. A moan escaped Cas, and he very much wished Cory was at his grandparents’ so he could have Dean right then and there. “I missed you, Dean.” Cas said, his voice low so only Dean would hear him. Cas said it against Dean’s lips, and those emerald green eyes lit up in response. It was hard these days for Cas to have the energy to have sex. Cas moved to bite Dean’s earlobe gently. “After Cory goes to sleep.” He said, his voice barely above a whisper. Dean’s whole body shivered, and he gave Cas a sly grin. Cas grinned back at him and moved to sit with Cory at the table. 

Dean filled plates with tacos and burritos. He’d gotten Cory a chicken bowl, he wasn’t one to like tacos, corn or flour. He got out some sodas and an apple juice for Cory. He pulled his own plate to him and sat down next to Cas. He’d been looking forward to this day. It was the best, being home with Cas and Cory. Dean was trying to think about that, than what had happened at work. He’d gotten into a fight with Leo. He’d told Leo that he was angry with him for telling Cas about his hooking days. That should have been something Dean got to do himself. It wasn’t funny that Leo was still trying to come between them. Dean ate half of one of his tacos in one bite, and chewed. Cas and Cory were talking about  _ My Little Pony _ , which they loved to watch together. His husband and son were total bronies. He thought it was adorable. Plus, it gave them something to bond about. Dean loved that they were bonding about something. He felt Cory’s brown eyes on him, and he gave his son a sly smile. “What’s up, kiddo?” He asked, once his mouth was free of taco. Cory asked if he could have some ice cream when he was done eating. Dean pretended to think it over, but he gave his son a smile. “Yeah, one scoop.” He told him, and Cory grinned wide, showing his clear white baby teeth growing in. “I know you were good for Pa, so you deserve a reward.” Dean told him, as he got up to get another soda. He tried not to drink until Cory was asleep or not home. He might have  _ a _ beer, but that was it. 

About an hour later, Cory was asleep at John and Jody’s. Dean was glad they lived so close to family. Now he and Cas were in their underwear on the couch, a pitcher of margaritas and vanilla ice cream in front of them. Dean was enjoying his ice cream with strawberry margarita on the top of it. Cas was wearing one of Dean’s high school wrestling tee shirts and a pair of boxer briefs with Spongebob on them. Dean was wearing a pair of ladies’ hipsters, bright red and silky satin. With nothing else. Dean and Cas were entangled together on the couch, Netflix on tv. Cas had turned on  _ Community _ . They were rewatching it together. Dean was already halfway wasted, and he blurted out, “Cas, I love you. No matter what Leo Webb says.” 

At the loud outburst, Cas turned to look at his husband. “I love you too, Dean. What happened at work today?” He could tell that something had, Dean had been quiet since he’d gotten home. “I know something’s up. You don’t have to tell me, but you know that you can tell me anything. I will still love you.” He hated when things happened at work that caused Dean to be upset. Cas  _ really _ wanted to tell Leo off, maybe kiss his ass a bit, but that wouldn’t be for awhile. Moving around a lot was still something he wasn’t able to really do. He ate his ice cream slowly, and had drank only one cup of the margaritas. You weren’t supposed to drink on one of the meds he was taking. Although the weed was going to be readied as soon as Dean was done eating his ice cream. Cas leaned out to kiss him tenderly. 

This didn’t surprise Dean, that Cas knew he was buggin’ about something. He sighed. “Got into a fight with Leo.” Dean’s voice was quiet and small. “I don’t know where his bravado is coming from.” John had already made it clear that his job was in danger. Dean had put up an ad for a new drummer in the paper. Dean’s heart was broken, because he was losing Leo as a friend. They’d been friends since grade school. Dean moved to start filling up a vape pen for them to smoke. It helped with Cas’ pain. Dean really hoped they’d get the tumor shrunk enough so they could take it out. Dean couldn’t lose Cas. “Dad already warned him twice.” He paused to clear his throat. “He’s going to lose his job if he doesn’t stop his bullshit. I put an ad for a new drummer in the paper.” Dean put the weed in the grinder. He ground it as he went to keep speaking. “Dad almost hit him the other day. He, Leo, that is, was in my face about picking you when I barely knew you. I was trying my best to ignore him and keep working. Dad, though, he was pissed as  _ fuck _ . If Uncle Bobby hadn’t gotten Dad away from him, he would have laid Leo out. I just, I miss being able to be friends with him. I’ve known him my whole life.” Dean finished with the vape and handed it off to Cas to hit it first. Dean moved to pour himself another drink and took a deep sip. He was going to be  _ so _ hungover the next morning. It was justified. 

Taking a deep hit of the vape, Cas looked at his husband. Dean was already totally wasted. Not that he blamed him. Dean had liked Gabriel. And with Leo Webb aside, it reminded Dean of losing Sam. And they were already dealing with so much. It was amazing Dean wasn’t falling down drunk every day. Cas reached to hand him the vape, and his fingers brushed Dean’s. He held on tightly. Dean lifted his eyes to Cas’ blue ones. Cas squeezed his fingers. “You’ve got so much on your shoulders. And you’ve never once complained. I don’t know what I’d do without you. I love you so so so much. I don’t know what brought us together, but I thank God every day that it happened. We’re doing better than a lot of couples. We’re going to make it through all of this. I don’t know how, but I know that we are. Because we love each other.” Cas went to coughing and drank some water. He was done with the booze. Dean pounded on him on his back to help. “I don’t know how it’ll work out, I just know that it will.” Cas loved Dean with all of his heart. Cas wouldn’t say it out loud, but he was so so scared of dying. Not from Constantine, he was sure Jody would catch him. But from the cancer. It was in his family, but no male family member had ever gotten it. Why did he have to be the first? And why did he have to lose Gabriel? He loved his brother, and he was the only one who supported Cas’ sexuality. But Connie knew that, and had been counting on it. Cas couldn’t get the sight of Gabe’s head out of his mind. 

Hitting the vape, Dean could tell Cas had something on his mind. He wondered if it was about his brother or the cancer. Dean was sure it was both. “You dealing with Gabe okay?” He sipped his drink again, and he knew what the  _ real _ answer was. Dean was  _ still  _ messed up about Sam, years later. Not a  _ lot _ of years, but he knew how Cas was feeling. Dean knew they also needed to talk about the cancer. They hadn’t yet. Cas was trying to act as if everything was normal. Which Dean thought he kind of got. It was something huge and scary. Dean slid a hand through his floppy brown hair (Cas liked it a little bit longer) and reached to take the vape from Cas when he passed it. 

Cas knew why Dean had chosen to ask that particular question. He didn’t want to talk about the cancer, either. Cas toyed with the plastic spoon he’d used to eat his ice cream. “I just, I keep thinking this is all my fault. I know it’s not. It’s Connie’s fault. But this obsessed with  _ me _ . If I hadn’t gone out with him, Gabe would still be alive. He was the only one in my family who accepted me for who I am.” Cas’ blue eyes brushed with tears. “Zachariah, Michael, Anna, my parents, they all tossed me aside.” Dean knew this, those were Cas’ siblings. Cas hadn’t heard from them in years, and his parents were dead. Cas sniffled as he accepted the vape back from Dean. “I wish I could take it all back. Never give Conne the time of day.” 

Scooting closer to Cas, Dean pressed his lips to his and cupped Cas’ scruffy jaw in his hand. His eyes bored into Cas’ blue ones. “None of this is your fault, babe. You couldn’t know how this guy was going to react. You got the feeling he was creepy, so you ended it. None of this is on you.” Dean would give  _ anything _ to be able to kill this guy for what he had done. But Dean knew that Cas and Cory both needed him. He kissed Cas again, slowly and tenderly. “You don’t have to worry about anything anymore. You know this. I’m going to protect you with my life.” Dean pulled Cas into his lap. Cas’ arms went around Dean’s neck. Dean’s arms slid around Cas’ waist. He rubbed Cas’ back, his hands settling on the small of it. 

Cas felt at home in Dean’s arms. He could feel Dean’s cock against his, and he began to roll his hips. Dean let out a surprised gasp, but he leaned out to kiss Cas. They both moved against each other, cocks rubbing together through their underwear. Cas gasped as he came after only a few rolls. It also surprised him that Dean came a few moments after he did. Cas kissed him, deeply, and didn’t even care that they were both sticky with cum. Cas let his fingers play in the hair at the nape of Dean’s neck, earning him a soft moan from his husband. They stayed like that, just kissing, for about an hour or so. Cas could stay like this forever. He buried his head in Dean’s neck and took a deep sniff. He was glad that he had Dean. Hr wouldn’t know how to get through any of this without him. 

_ We didn’t know what hit us _ _   
_ _ We had to stop and catch a breath _ _   
_ _ Like a brick wall in a train tunnel  _ _   
_ _ Only scared us half to death  _

_ You’d have thought we could’ve seen it coming _ _   
_ _ The way the two of us were runnin’  _ _   
_ _ But I guess that’s the way it is  _ _   
_ _ If you’ve never been  _ _   
  
_

_ Hit by love, struck by lightening _ _   
_ _ Bound forever, there’s no denying _ _   
_ _ That all we want is everything that makes  _ _   
_ _ Love like this come true _

_ Oh, emotionally on our knees _ _   
_ _ It took a moment to believe _ _   
_ _ But there we were, the two of us, hit by love _

_ Looking back is easy if you’ve got memories like ours _ _   
_ _ We crashed like two headlights and we’re still seeing stars _

_ And I don’t want to stop and wonder where we’ll find  _ _   
_ _ That rollin’ thunder ‘cause my heart knows you and me _ _   
_ _ Are always gonna be _

  
  
**_Author’s note: So, this should have been up weeks ago. Sorry for the delay. You can thank all the Cockles on my dash for this update. Got all of the feels, and I had to get them out. Sorry for the angst and death. I’m sure more is coming. Angst, that is. I’m not planning more death. I didn’t plan Gabe’s. Was also inspired by this great Destiel fic_ ** _ Start of Something Good _ **_. Check it out. Anyway, hanging in! Hope to update again soon._ **


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